500 Lovemaking Tips & Secrets
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Why Masturbation Is a Good Idea page 5
No woman in her right mind would put pressure on her mate. She knows that’s not a good thing. The problem is she feels pressure too. She doesn’t have an orgasm and she begins to wonder if she is the only woman who doesn’t have them. After all she has seen movies and read novels and magazines. It seems everybody is having orgasms except her. Maybe something is wrong with her? Maybe the problem is her choice of lovers. Maybe he is a poor lover? Maybe it is time to find somebody else? But the next one, and the next, and the next all fall short. Why must she always be getting involved with such poor lovers? In truth many women have a problem climaxing. Of course, it is no real surprise. It would be surprising if it were not so. There is no physical reason for women to have more difficulty obtaining orgasms than men. The problem is one of education. Most women have been taught by their mothers not to touch themselves “down there.” One woman recalled how as a 12-year-old girl she accidentally discovered masturbation only to be caught by her grandmother. “I didn’t even know what I was doing. ‘ She said, ‘I was lying on the flooring, fully clothed, watching TV and somehow or other I got some material rolled up beneath me on the floor. I started squirming around on it a little trying to get comfortable. That’s when I discovered this felt good. I didn’t know why it felt good or what I was doing, I just knew it felt real good to me. So I started rolling around on it a little. That’s when Grandma walked in. She was horrified! She was quite stern with me and told me nice girls didn’t do that. I was to never touch myself down there again. Of course I still do. But it’s a wonder after the talk I got.”
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Masturbation provides an education for women too. Women who masturbate generally find it easier to orgasm during intercourse than those women who don’t. Yet women, often have sex with a partner before they have sex with themselves. That’s a shame! How on earth can they expect anyone to please them? They have yet to discover how their bodies work. They don’t know what pleases them and yet they have high expectations that someone else will introduce them to the all the pleasures their bodies can provide them. How terribly unrealistic. How sad. Unfortunately they often pass these unrealistic expectations on to their partners. Performance anxiety has never been the friend of good sex.
