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~ Because the back issues are old, some links and info will be out of date ~

July 28 , 2007

Hi Lovelies, it's Kara here,

In this issue:
1) Where I've Been --- and Why You Haven't Heard From Me In a While
1A) Details of our trip...
2) My Engagement/Wedding Ring
3) Keep Letting Me Know What You Want Me To Write About
4) How To Break Up With a Good Person
5) How To Be Irresistible (Which Also Happens To Build Confidence)
6) Perking Up a Sagging Marriage
7) Kegels For Better Health and More Fun In Bed

1) Where I've Been -- and Why You Haven't Heard From Me In a While

The reason you haven't heard from me is that most of the time I did not
have access to the internet and only via wireless. I've received many
emails wondering why you haven't received a newsletter for a while
and I really appreciate that you cared enough to write.

1A) Details Of Our Trip To Scotland & Ireland
I've written the details of where we went and what we did here.

2) My Engagement/Wedding Ring

Today we met with the woman who showed us several diamonds for my
engagement/wedding ring (I want only one ring). We found a spectacular
stone and Monday she is taking us to the man who will create the ring I've
designed. He'll make a wax mould and unless we need him to change
anything it will be ready in two weeks. I'll take pictures and share when he
gifts me with the official, surprise proposal. When he told me he wanted to
marry me I told him that I wanted a romantic proposal but that I wanted a
lot of input on the ring. He said he could pull that off. It's been fun working
together to come up with a design be both like and then picking the
diamond together. Once he picks up the ring he'll then surprise me with
the when and the how. I will not see the finished ring until then. It's all
so exciting. I can't wait to show the ring to you. Now I've got to get my
stubby fingernails to grow because this ring deserves nice looking hands.
Mine will never be gorgeous but maybe with some length I'll do the ring
justice. A girlfriend's previously weak and splitting nails are now strong
and gorgeous because of the new vitamins she's taking. If they work on
me I'll send you the link.

The reason you haven't heard from me is that most of the time I did not
have access to the internet and only via wireless. I've received many
emails wondering why you haven't received a newsletter for a while
and I really appreciate that you cared enough to write.

3) Keep Letting Me Know What You Want Me To Write About

I really appreciate how many of you have written to give me ideas
for topics for articles. The next two articles are things you
asked for. To give me more ideas just click here.

4) Breaking Up With a Good Person

This is a question that Kelly sent to me, wondering how to break up
with a good guy.

If someone has done something really crummy and hurtful, it's easy
to tell them to go jump off the end of a cliff. I'd prefer you did it with
grace, so that it never comes back as a story about how awful you
can be, but sometimes it feels so good to just let 'er rip.

But when the person is really nice, cares about us, didn't do anything
bad but you just know it's not right, it's much more difficult. As it so
happens, I was reading in this month's O Magazine how to do just
that. It's on page 144 if you have the August issue. Here are the
suggestions in a nutshell:

1. Show up in person. It's more respectful and can't be misinterpreted
the way email or voice message can be.

2. Consider the Setting. It should offer relative privacy, a quick exit,
allowing the other person to feel comfortable and react safely.

3. Rehearse (But Only a Little). Know basically what you want to say
but it will feel more genuine and sincere if it isn't rehearsed.

4. Remind Yourself That You're Not the Bad Guy. You're doing them
a favor by not leading them on. It's the kindest thing you can do to
admit that you both need to move on.

5. Acknowledge How Hard This Is. Start with "I don't know how to say
this, but I must tell you something." Then say what you need to say in
as kind a way as possible.

6. Slip In Some Praise. Offer some praise by mentioning the qualities
you admire most in them and explain that you don't see a future and
that they deserve to be in a wonderful relationship.

7. Let the Other Person React. They need to be allowed to react but
remember that they are the ones that are being surprised. You don't
need to react, just stay calm and allow them the dignity they deserve.
If they get angry and it becomes uncomfortable, tell them you are
going to allow some time to cool down and leave the room.

8. Express Empathy. Be concerned, acknowledge that you understand
that they are upset, offer Kleenex or water, and ask if they need some
privacy. But do not offer false hope.

I thought this advice was really good so it seemed logical to pass it
along to you. This advice works well with any bad news.

5) How To Be Irresistible (Which Happens To Build Confidence)

I had requests for both of these topics and when I started thinking
about it, I realized they were two parts of the same issue.

This, obviously, is a big topic but I can offer some tidbits here. As
any of you who have read Men Made Easy, you know how I feel
about being happy. It's the very, very best way to be attractive to
men. Smiling, good eye contact, good sense of humor, good
conversation skills all make you attractive and intriguing. To take
it further, into the irresistible realm, compliments (I love that tie),
praise ("I heard about that big client you just landed, very
impressive."), giving him opportunities to be a hero (would you
pour this wine for me, for some reason it just taste better when a
man pours it), let him be strong for you ("Would you be my hero
and carry this for me?"), let him catch you watching him from
across the room, then smile... All of these kind of things are
what I mean in the last secret of Men Made Easy, "A Man Wants
To Be With a Women Who Makes Him Feel Like a Man." If you
think this will make you weak or that it's just game-playing then
you won't be able to enjoy how delicious it feels to be a woman
who knows how to make a man feel like a man.

Where does confidence come in? Well, if you learn to do all of
the above (maybe practice on the bag boy and the delivery man)
then you will exude the kind of self-confidence that men find utterly
irresistible. Walk tall (stick those sisters out there), let yourself feel
attractive from the inside out, and you will become one of those
irresistible women that, when we see them, we wonder, "What
does she have that I don't?"

6) Perking Up a Sagging Marriage

This is another topic that was requested, actually by a couple of
you. Are you aware that I wrote a book about how to bring the
sparkle back into your marriage? It's called Marriage Made Easy
and you can read about it at HaveALifetimeOfLove.com

Here are a couple of tips from that book. If you both care enough
to want to make your marriage better, then these will work:

1. This is something from my book and I just read where Hugh
Downs talked about this in an article from his new book about his
marriage success. It's this: If you want to bring back the romantic
sparkles you felt way-back-when, just remember back to some
memories of when you were feeling in love.

I recommend you do a guided visualization to get you back to those
feelings. You can learn how to do this process on my web site. This
section is not up right now but you can access it by going to:
Alivewithlove.com/wise/wise.html

When you can feel those feelings in your body, like you felt them
when you were feeling those "in love sparkles" way-back-when
then go to your partner and share those memories. Describe
them in such detail that you feel those feelings, share what you're
feeling with him, and hopefully, he'll start to feel the same thing.
Then see what happens next. Be prepared to get amorous.

You can make this a part of your marriage by each of you
making a list of "in love memories" then sharing them with
each other over a glass of wine, maybe sitting on the floor
in front of the fireplace or out on the patio. It really works.

Another suggestion is to create a jar of things you've enjoyed
doing together, things that make you feel close, that maybe
you've quit doing. Or maybe you can write things that he has
done to make you feel loved and he can do the same, put
them in the jar and each week select something to do that
week. You can also sign up for the weekly Romance Reminders
by going to the Marriage Made Easy page, then when you
leave you'll get a pop-up you can fill in with your info. Go to
http://www.HaveALifetimeOfLove.com

7) Kegels For Better Health and More Fun In Bed
I know I've told you to do your Kegels before but it's time for
another reminder. They'll keep your urethra nice and tight
so you'll never need diapers when you get older, and you
will have stronger org*asms that are easier to attain and
sustain. Here's are the instructions:
http://www.alivewithlove.com/sensual/exercise.html
Trust me, it works.

8) Important Notice!

A lot of you have signed up to be on my other list, as I have
been requesting. If you got a newsletter before this arrived
then you have successfully put yourself on the correct list
and you can click unsubscribe below so you are taken off
of this list. I don't want you to keep getting two lists. If you
did not already get a newsletter, I need you to go to my web
site and sign up there. Just go to http://www.AliveWithLove.com
and click the offer for the ebooklet. I'm going to have to drop
this list host soon and then I won't be able to send to you again.

Joyfully,
Kara
"Celebrate Life–Be Happy!"

Kara Oh
P.O. Box 21803
Santa Barbara, CA 93121
Ph: 805-687-2448

~ If you haven't read Men Made Easy there are things about men you need to know. You can order here.

~ If you want to bring more life and love to your marriage you'll want to take a look at Marriage Made Easy.

~ And if you want your man to learn how to treat you like a queen you'll want him to read Women Made Easy.

Until next time, I'm wishing you mountains of love, romance, and happiness.

With much love,
Kara
"You draw to yourself that which you are." Oprah Winfrey
Visit AliveWithLove.com often: http://www.AliveWithLove.com

Kara Oh
Ph: 805-687-2448

Feel free to pass this newsletter on to your friends but please copy in it's entirety.

Copyright© April, 2007
by Kara Oh
Ph: 805-687-2448
P.O. Box 21803, Santa Barbara, CA 93121

Your e-mail address will never be sold or shared with anyone. Your personal information will always be kept strictly confidential.

Kara Oh is the author of
Men Made Easy
Marriage Made Easy
Women Made Easy
How To Capture His Heart (A dating guide - coming soon)

Past issues menu here

Kara Oh
P.O. Box 21803
Santa Barbara, CA 93121
805-687-2448